Jokes -Bar Jokes
Three Brothers
An Irish man walks into a pub. The bartender asks him, "what'll you have?" The man says, "Give me three pints of Guinness please." So the bartender brings him three pints and the man proceeds to alternately sip one, then the other, then the third until they're gone. He...view more
A seal visits a local bar
A seal walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink.The bartender asks the seal, "What's your pleasure?"The seal replies, "Anything but Canadian Club."...view more
A pirate at the local bar discusses his past
A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and talk turns to their adventures on the sea. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg-leg, a hook, and an eye patch.The seaman asks, "So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?" The pirate replies, "We were in a storm at sea, and I was swept overboa...view more
A nun arrives at the local bar
John was sitting outside his local pub one day, enjoying a quiet pint and generally feeling good about himself, when a nun suddenly appears at his table and starts decrying the evils of drink. "You should be ashamed of yourself young man! Drinking is a Sin! Alcohol is the blood of the devil!&qu...view more
A neutron at a bar
A neutron walks into a bar. "I'd like a beer" he says.The bartender promptly serves up a beer. "How much will that be?" asks the neutron. "For you?" replies the bartender, "no charge"...view more
A man takes the ferry home from work
John Smith lived in Staten Island, New York and worked in Manhattan. He had to take the ferryboat home every night. One evening, he got down to the ferry and found there was a wait for the next boat, so John decided to stop at a nearby tavern. Before long he was feeling no pain.When he got back to t...view more
A golf club visits a local bar
A golf club walks into a local bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer.The barman refuses to serve him. "Why not," asks the golf club."You'll be driving later," replies the bartender...view more
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